Things I Learned From A Year Of Long-Term Substitute Teaching

I’ve been missing from WrodPress for a year.  The reason I’ve been missing is because I decided to try a year in the classroom.

It was an interesting year.  I keep trying to figure out if it was the best decision or the worst decision ever.  I go back and forth between the two.  Through it all, I learned some very interesting things that I would never have learned in a university education classroom.  I am passing my knowledge on to you.

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1.  Kids Know When You Are Scared

I am not joking here.  That very first day, I put on a brave face and tried to tell myself that I was making it through the first, scariest day like a pro.  Truth is:  my kids (yes, I call them my kids and not my students) knew I was terrified.  They could smell the fear rolling off of me.  But, they were scared too.  That first day is the one that sets the tone.  No.  Wait.  It’s not just the first day.  I’d say it is the first week.  The first week sets how they will see you for the rest of the year.  Be as much of yourself as you can during that first week.  Be the version of yourself that you want them to see.  I was open with my students.  I let them ask me all sorts of questions to figure me out.  I played getting to know you games so I could learn about them.  After a few days, I was less scared and they were more at ease with me.  It really set the foundation for the tone and nature of the relationships we built that year.

2.  Kids Will Test You As Much As You Test Them

I am not a fan of testing.  I’ll be very honest about that.  While I think it is impossible to grade a student without giving them some sort of overall exam on the material, I cannot stand the way standardized, formal, intensive testing is set up.  I mean, when in life do you have to go into something without being allowed to rely on resources like peers, Google, or notes on your project?  But, being a teacher, you have to roll with it.  Testing kids every two weeks, or sooner, is part of the job.  While I tested them on the content, they tested my very patience and the ability to bite my tongue.  Be aware:  KIDS WILL SAY ANYTHING TO GET YOU UPSET.  They test every limit you have.  Each one of my kids tested me in some way.  They pushed me.  And, I’m thankful that they did.  It was a real pain the in you-know-what at the time.  But, looking back on it, I thank them.  Be prepared to be tested as much as you test them.  Maybe more.

3.  Respect Is A Two Way Street

This is a big one with older students.  I never treated my kids like they were anything other than nearly grown adults with the ability to make decisions.  I presented material to them like they were peers.  I listened to their life problems no matter how big or small without being condescending or patronizing.  When they were upset, I treated them like adults and let them talk it out.  When they were sad, I allowed them to grieve.  When they were anxious, I allowed them to have a minute to breathe.  It’s a really simple thing, but one of the toughest things a person in charge of a classroom full of 35 students remembers during the thick of things.  These kids are 16, 17, 18 year old grown people with real life problems.  I had students who were parents.  I had students who had to hold down full time jobs to support their family.  I had students who were pregnant.  These are real life problems.  They need the same kind of compassion and respect as you would give any adult.  If there is any one piece of advice I can give any potential educator it is this:  treat your students like you want to be treated.  They will reward you with the kind of respect that you expect out of someone your own age.

4.  Never Be Afraid To Apologize Or Admit You Were Wrong

Yeah, this is a strange one.  It was an interesting thing to learn, though.  I always thought that if I showed a moment of weakness that the kids would take advantage of it.  But, the opposite happened.  I’ll give you an example.  One day, I started teaching something that I thought I fully understood but didn’t explain well to my students.  They latched on to a concept that I didn’t explain in perfect clarity.  Later, I was going through their class work and realized it was wrong.  Like, every single one of my students got it wrong.  I was so upset.  I thought, “how did you all get this wrong when you seemed to have it right in class.”  I went to my mentor teacher, Lauren, and presented the strangeness to her.  She picked up on the issue right away.  (Thank God for veteran teachers being paired up with n00bs)  I was the problem.  I said something the wrong way and they got it the wrong way.  I taught it incorrectly.  It was all me.  I spent the night crying over it and thinking of all the students during their SATs or ACTs that would fail because of my mistake.  Lauren reminded me that there was time and an easy way to correct the mistake.  That wasn’t the issue.  I didn’t know how to stand in front of a group of students and tell them, point blank, that I was wrong.  I thought that if you admitted you were a dumb-dumb that they would never trust you again.  The opposite is true.  As I stood there and explained to them about my bone-head mistake, they all laughed.  They weren’t laughing at me.  They were laughing because they saw my humanity and humility.  I’m not a God.  I’m not all-seeing and all-powerful.  I’m a human who makes human mistakes.  They saw that.  It didn’t make them doubt me or question my ability; it made them see that no one is perfect and to respect that I admitted my wrong.  Never, ever be afraid that your students will doubt you if you admit you were wrong.  Apologize often.  They will respect you more if you come clean about your mistakes.  Model the behavior you want them to express.

5.  Do Not Underestimate The Empathy Of This Generation

Another thing I never realized.  My kids weren’t jaded or emotional robots.  They have the ability to show compassion and empathy.  They aren’t heartless or cruel.  They are the most amazing people.  We, the adults not of the generation, think there is less compassion in the current generation.  I have done a 180 and changed my opinion on that thanks to my kids.  They are, quite possibly, more compassionate, sympathetic, and empathetic than my generation.  Again, I’ll give you an example.  During the first part of the second semester of my year at my beloved school I started experiencing severe pain in my right side.  I knew that I had a faulty gallbladder.  I had been trying to control it with diet and exercise, delaying surgery as long as possible.  But, my gallbladder had other ideas.  The pain was so severe.  I kept trying to teach.  I would grab at my side and sit down several times during a 15 minute lecture.  But, I kept trying to muscle through.  My kids knew something was really, really wrong.  They said I was deathly pale and sweating…I don’t remember that.  They said I wasn’t making much sense in what I was saying…I don’t remember that.  Finally, the pain was too much to bear and I ended up laying down on the floor just to get some relief and rest.  I did this during the middle of a class.  I’m not proud to admit this.  My poor kids.  One kid ran to the nurse.  One kid ran to the office.  One kid grabbed the phone in my room and called for help.  Several kids ran to me to check on me.  They kept me talking and made sure I was still coherent.  I had my gallbladder out the very next day.  I received dozens of texts, phone calls, and tweets from my students asking how I was doing.  During my two weeks of recovery, they kept in touch with me.  They sent me videos from my room and updates on a daily basis of what was happening.  They policed the classroom when things were starting to get out of control with a different sub.  Upon my return, I have never received so much love, hugs, cards, and tears of joy than that day.  And this is the thing that reminded me that this generation is more, better, have bigger hearts than my generation.  Just because you hear about the amount of bullying, cyber and otherwise, that is sweeping this generation, it doesn’t mean that there is an equal or higher number of students who have endless amounts of love and compassion for their teachers and peers.  These kids are more compassionate than the media makes them out to be.

6.  Allow Yourself To Love Them; You’ll Be Loved In Return

I was very honest with my students about my love.  I told them every day that I loved them.  I reminded them that my love was unconditional.  I reminded them that even when I was mad or upset or disappointed, I still loved them.  I loved them when they were at school, when they screwed up, when they were in trouble, when they yelled at me, when they were sick.  I loved them like I loved my own child.  Here is the truth: as an educator, you may be the only person that day to tell them that they are loved.  No, not all households are like this.  You may only encounter one in a thousand students that never hear that they are loved.  But, telling them that they are loved might be the most important thing they hear that day.  I am not ashamed to admit that I loved my kids.  I will love them forever.  They are always in my heart and in my mind.  I know this.

Funny thing is, they loved me back.  The last day of the school year, I allowed my students the ability to say whatever they wanted to me (within reason, of course) about the year we were together.  I expected to get a mountain of negative.  Maybe they were holding things in about how they didn’t like my clothes or my teaching style or my sarcastic attitude.  But, no, that isn’t what happened.  Overwhelmingly, they wanted me to know how much I was loved by them.  They reminded me that my love for them was received, reciprocated, and that they knew it was real.

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My life is forever changed from my year at that school.  Not only did it solidify my pie-in-the-sky idea that I’d be a good teacher, it reminded me that people like me are needed.  Sure, I may not be the traditional teacher.  I have tattoos and I drink too much coffee and I use sarcasm as a defense mechanism.  But, I’m the teacher that these kids needed for that year.  They bought in to the material because I was passionate about it.  They came to my class to hear the strange analogies I’d make that day (I once used football as a way to explain arcs).  They came to class to hear about my crazy life.  They came to class to tell me about their crazy life.  They came to class.  That’s the thing.  They came to class.  I got them in the seats and I made the subject of Geometry interesting enough to keep them engaged.

Half the battle with teaching, from what I’ve learned, is getting them to feel connected.  Instead of getting them to try and connect with the material first and me second, I tried to do it the opposite way.  I remembered from all my years in school that I learned more from the teachers and professors that I felt a connection with.  The subject didn’t matter to me as much as the teacher.  By way of being in the classroom with the teacher I liked, I learned more.  Even if the subject was one I struggled with (for me, it was history), I learned more from being in a classroom where the teacher was engaging.

Look, I’m not a professional.  I am simply a person who has a passion for teaching.  My experiences in the year I was in a classroom made me realize how little is taught in education classes about what to expect in a real life classroom.  And, I don’t think you can teach that.  Every classroom is different.  Every student is different.  Every year is different.  I think the biggest thing is to remember that it won’t always be the same and don’t be so rigid in your beliefs that you forget to connect.

I’m excited to start a new year.  We are about a month from the first bell and I can’t wait.  I accepted a position that puts me in a classroom teaching for another three years.  I will be teaching for the Jobs for America’s Graduates program at the same school I spent last year at.  I can’t wait to see what this next year brings.